Today, after 4 days without being able to poop, now, while sitting stuck in traffic, I have the sudden urge to use the bathroom. FML [...]
Thu, Jul 18, 2019, Continue reading at the source
Today, one of my friends came over to go swimming in my pool. Before going back into the house, as it's all carpeted, I automatically took off my trunks, forgetting about my friend. I realized my mistake when my friend commented on my abnormally long foreskin. FML [...]
Thu, Jul 18, 2019, Continue reading at the source
Today, my father, who I haven't spoken to in over 12 years, contacted me. He just wanted to let me know that I should get tested for a rare neurological disease. The only thing the man has given to me since my conception is potentially a death certificate. FML [...]
Thu, Jul 18, 2019, Continue reading at the source
Today, I asked my wife who she would choose, me or the dog. She chose the dog. No hesitation. FML [...]
Thu, Jul 18, 2019, Continue reading at the source