Today, my stepmother proved once again that she likes to play favourites. She has no job, so anything she gifts comes from my dad's account. On my last birthday, I got £5 on a cheap card. Today, my step-brother's birthday, he got £400 and an iPad. He's 4 years old. FML [...]
Tue, May 15, 2018, Continue reading at the source
Today, while working at Lowe's, I had to deal with a situation in one of the bathroom aisles. Unfortunately, it wasn't someone sitting on one of the toilets. It was two guys fucking in one of the shower displays. FML [...]
Tue, May 15, 2018, Continue reading at the source
Today, I really had to pee at work and rushed to the urinal. I unzipped but couldn't find the hole in the front of my boxers and ended up pissing my pants. I had put my boxers on backwards. FML [...]
Mon, May 14, 2018, Continue reading at the source
Today, I told my mom I had 73 cents in my checking account. She gave me a penny and told me I had 74 cents and it was even now. Thanks mom. FML [...]
Mon, May 14, 2018, Continue reading at the source
Today, I had the class clown of my preschoolers oversleep our daily 15-minute nap. Not wanting to spare any more class time on his disrupting jokes, I let the headache sleep. After another 10 minutes we called an ambulance. He had a stroke. FML [...]
Mon, May 14, 2018, Continue reading at the source
Wondering what you're looking at? Teeth nails. Molars to be exact. FML. [...]
Mon, May 14, 2018, Continue reading at the source
Today, I went to sleep at 7am. I learned once that Indians used to drink tons of water before bed to force themselves awake so I did that in case my alarm (which I hooked up to my speakers) didn't work. The alarm worked, but the shock of the blasting sound made me pee my pants. FML [...]
Mon, May 14, 2018, Continue reading at the source